Golden Globes 2014 – Cat Calls

The first big awards show of the 2014 season, the Golden Globes, is officially over. As always, everyone was talking about the red carpet hits and misses, the big winners, and the big sinners. American Hustle walked away with the most hardware and Cecil B. DeMille honouree Woody Allen didn’t show up, but the gossip doesn’t stop there. Here’s how this Cat called it:

Too Many Shots of U2’s Bono
I seriously think the camera crew was in love as they cut to the music icon sitting in the audience almost every segment. He received almost more screen time than the hosts. Speaking of which . . .

More Tina Fey and Amy Poehler
The girls lived up to their dynamic duo name and got big laughs during their opening monologue. Later, Poehler dressed up as a teenage boy and Fey’s love child and proceeded to walk among the audience looking for her real father. That was about it though. I thought they were very funny and would have liked to see them get more stage time.

Jacqueline Bisset Hot Mess
After looking truly shocked that she won Best Supporting Actress in a TV Show, Miniseries or TV Movie, veteran British actress Jacqueline Bisset made everyone wait as she lollygagged her way onto the stage only to give a horrendous thank you speech that made her appear completely incompetent. She was even bleeped for using the “S” word.

P Diddy, Usher and Kate
Poor Kate Beckinsale. She didn’t stand a chance of getting near the microphone with these two egomaniacs on stage. Usher muscled himself into the centre position for the first award – after which P Diddy “voice bombed” the winner. Next, Puffy muscled out Usher for the second award and again refused to shut up after the winner was announced. Rude. Ungentlemanly. Greedy. I would have like to see Kate in the middle and she should have announced the winner each time.

Diane Keaton’s Lame Speech and Song
No one was expecting Woody Allen to actually show up for his award, but when Diane Keaton showed up in his place I at least expected something interesting. How bad was it? To quote Keaton directly “If Woody saw this he’d say ‘Get the hook and get her the [bleep] off the stage’”. Ending with the song “Make new friends, but keep the old” was just the icing on the cake. Also hated the girl tux she wore. Ugh.

Best Dressed – Amy Adams, Jessica Chastain, Kate Beckinsale, Margot Robbie.

Golden Globes 2014 - Best Dressed

There were so many good gowns to choose from but these ladies topped everyone opting for classic lines, elegant fabrics and daring details. Cate Blanchett and Mila Kunis get runner-up mentions here also.

Worst Dressed – Drew Barrymore, Jessica Lange, Kaley Cuoco and Zooey Deschanel

Golden Globes 2014 - Worst Dressed

This is definitely a case of love the actress, hate the dress. Drew Barrymore, I know you’re pregnant but this dress, and that orange-red lipstick and shoes, did not work. Jessica Lange looked frumpy in velvet. Big Bang Theory’s Kaley Cuoco tried to be daring but her dress just looked like a big cheap tattoo. And Zooey, this isn’t your fault, I just hate hate hate boxy crop tops and cap sleeves even if they are Oscar de la Renta. Also close runner ups here were Jennifer Lawrence, who has an awesome body and didn’t need the big white kleenex-meets-sausage dress, and Julia Roberts just because I didn’t like the shirt-under-a-ballgown look either.

Counting Number of Times Red Carpet Hosts Said the Word “Amazing”
Thanks to the NBC feed, we were stuck watching Matt Lauer, Savannah Guthrie and Tamron Hall on the red carpet this year. Going through the paces, I think they told everyone they interviewed how “amazing” their dress/movie/performance was this year. Boring. Would have made for a good drinking game though.

Leonard DiCaprio
Love him or hate him, Leo is bank. His acceptance speech for winning Best Actor, Motion Picture, Comedy for The Wolf of Wall Street was one of the evening’s most elegant. But I do think it’s about time he stopped dating his Mom.

Paula Patton Nipple Shot
Have stylists and actresses learned nothing from last year’s Anne Hathaway “nipple-gate”. Ladies, wear a bra or at least cover those up.

Golden Globes 2014

Real Life Philomena Lee and Niki Lauda
It was heartwarming to see both the real life Philomena Lee (from the film Philomena) and Formula One car driver Niki Lauda (from the film Rush) appear on stage to present. Too bad they forgot about Canadian Ambassador Ken Taylor last year – but then again, his role in Argo was deemed to be a minor one, which was also too bad.

First Win by Netflix
Robin Wright took home the Globe for Best Actress, TV Drama for the Netflix produced series House of Cards. The win marks the first time in history that a TV internet series hits the big time. Other than the side boob slip, this win has to have traditional network executive nervous as to what the future holds. Congrats Netflix.

Golden Globes 2014

By Catherine Barr

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